Sure, his character died in a meat explosion on a Paris subway, and then was mercilessly mocked for proclivities that hit close to real life, but Charlie Sheen still very much enjoyed the season premiere of the rejiggered “Two and a Half Men.”
“That’s got to be the highest attended funeral of all time,” he Sheen told Access Hollywood on Friday night. “And it’s interesting because I’m doing [a] film with Roman Coppola and there is a funeral scene in that. So I’m a guy that’s gonna have to survive my own funeral twice in the same year!”
Sheen will be starring in Coppola’s “A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charlie Swan III,” which Variety reports is about a successful, wealthy graphic designer who sees his girlfriend break up with him and his life head into a downward spiral. Come to think of it, it’s a bit like Kutcher’s Walden Schmidt character on “Men.”
Sheen hosted a viewing party for the premiere episode of “Two and a Half Men,” even tweeting a picture of it. “Surrounded by friends and watching the premier [sic] of Two and a Half Men. Odd… But cool..! So far a lot of laughs!! Nice…” he wrote.
“It was a big night for everybody on Monday night — for ‘Two and a Half,’ for us, for me,” he said, referring to his old show and his own successful Comedy Central roast. “I think everybody won. I thought the show was really good. I thought [Ashton] was terrific.”
The kind words follow the new pattern of the Nice Charlie — very different from the psychotic Charlie that got him fired from the show back in the spring — who first emerged during an appearance with Jay Leno and then went global with a speech at the Emmys earlier in the month.
“From the bottom of my heart, I wish you nothing but the best from this upcoming season. We spent eight wonderful years together, and I know you will continue to make great television,” he said, addressing the show before a worldwide audience. He also met with Kutcher backstage, tweeting out a photo of their meeting.
During his appearance with Leno, Sheen said that, based on his wild behavior, he “would have fired his ass,” from the show, too.
The numbers are in: Comedy Central’s Roast of Charlie Sheen was watched by 6.4 million total viewers, Comedy Central reports.
The ratings also make the Sheen joke fest the most watched and highest rated roast ever for Comedy Central.
Meanwhile on CBS, Ashton Kutcher‘s first day on the job at “Two and a Half Men” didn’t do poorly, either. CBS reports that nearly 28 million viewers (27.76, to be exact) tuned in to see how Sheen’s character was killed off the show and to watch Kutcher take over.
It was not only a series high for “Men,” but it also made the half-hour sitcom’s premiere the best among scripted shows since “Desperate Housewives” in 2005.
The show was taped Saturday, but the full special won’t air until next Monday. Luckily, outlets like Entertainment Weekly and The Los Angeles Times were there to cover the event. And so we present to you some of the top takedowns of the evening. Well, the more tame takedowns, anyway. We can’t repeat many of the insults from the show, but trust us, they’re bad.
Host Seth MacFarlane had more than a few zingers up his sleeve.
“Charlie, you claim to have ‘tiger blood,’ but after all the porn stars you’ve [slept with], it’s probably Tiger Woods’ blood.”
MacFarlane continued, “’On ‘Two And A Half Men‘ tonight, they’re apparently having a funeral for Charlie’s character. But there’s no need to switch over; in two months, you can probably see the real thing.”
Comedian Jeffery Ross attacked an innocent ’90s movie franchise: “You’re the black sheep of a family that produced three ‘Mighty Ducks‘ movies.” Ross, who traveled with Sheen for part of his live tour, told People before the roast, “He puts the ‘harming’ in ‘charming.'”
Seasoned comedian Jon Lovitz joked, “How much blow can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill ‘Two and a Half Men.”
“Jackass” star Steve-O, who intentionally broke his nose on fellow roaster Mike Tyson’s fist, was handing out insults despite his injury: “Charlie still hasn’t hit rock bottom. He’s looking forward to it, though, because he thinks there’s a rock there.”
The most surprising roast participant was perhaps “Private Practice” star Kate Walsh, who quipped, “Charlie is an amazing medical specimen. I guess that’s what comes from waking up at the crack of crack.”
Charlie, for his part, reportedly smiled through the roast. He told CNN before he went in that he was feeling good, and wasn’t worried at all about what jokes the roasters would break out. “Nothing’s off limits,” he said.
“Once again I have come out unscathed,” Sheen declared afterwards, according to EW. And as is tradition, he got to get in some jokes of his own at the end.
Touching his chest, he quipped, “Here beats an eternal flame. I just need to keep it away from a crack pipe.”
Sheen, 46, went on to claim that he’s “done with ‘the winning,’ because I’ve already won.”
To hear the more extreme jokes, catch the full roast on Monday, September 19 at 10/9c on Comedy Central. Remember, that’s the same night as the season premiere of “Two And A Half Men“!
Charlie Sheen is extremely grateful that Ashton Kutcher replaced him on “Two and a Half Men” — telling reporters, if Ashton hadn’t taken his old spot … Charlie would never have been able to kick-start his career.
According to Charlie, his funeral on the show just adds some closure to the story — telling us, “I have always been told that I have 9 lives, so it is going to amazing to witness my own funeral which is clearly a win/win situation because Ashton has just given me a 10th.”
As we previously reported, Charlie is making a huge comeback after “Men” — announcing his brand new TV project based on “Anger Management.”
But something tells us, Ashton won’t be getting a “Thank You” letter in the mail.
Ashton Kutcher shows off his raunchy humor in the teaser ad for the upcoming season of Two and a Half Men. The campaign shows Ashton, Jon Cryer and Angus T. Jones seemingly naked while holding up a banner with their launch date that reads: “All will be revealed…”
Yep, they’ve got our attention.
Ashton seems to be settling in as Charlie Sheen‘s replacement on the hit sitcom, but recently acknowledged that he has big warlock boots to fill, saying in a statement:
“I can’t wait to get to work with this ridiculously talented 2.5 team and I believe we can fill the stage with laughter that will echo in viewers’ homes. I can’t replace Charlie Sheen, but I’m going to work my ass off to entertain the hell out of people!”
Ashton is reportedly getting a huge paycheck for his new TV role. Sources say he’ll rake in $1 million per episode on Two and a Half Men!